The great Chinese philosopher, editor and politician Confucius said, “Where ever you go there you are”. If you stop and give yourself time to find the meaning behind this insightful phrase, you will find the essence of Life Coaching.
Everywhere you go and in whatever situation you find yourself, you are essentially the same person. With Life Coaching you have the wonderful possibility to discover the best person you can be in all areas of your life. Through the Life Coaching process you get the opportunity to be the best person you can be by improving upon, modifying, or changing those things that are keeping you from having a more peaceful, fulfilling, organized, and successful life.
Success is not measured by the amount of money or valuables you have accumulated: it is measured by the knowledge that you were the best “you” in all your endeavors of the day, personally and professionally.
More often than not, our Business clients start Coaching thinking that what they need is some tool to be better professionally; once we start our Coaching sessions, though, they share things about themselves that are clearly personal life issues, things such as relationship problems (usually based on poor communication skills), starting a family, balancing work and family life, parenting young children, disciplining young children and teens, dealing with a loved one’s addiction, infidelity in the marriage, etc., experiences that are commonly shared by all human beings and are the true issues weighing on their minds that they are having trouble succeeding in and/or resolving. Only when our clients’ personal lives are balanced can their business lives thrive.
Life Coaching gives the client the opportunity to do foundation work in a 100% confidential environment with his or her Life Coach, not by exploring the past (Coaches are not Psychologists) but by focusing on their present behaviors and the unwanted results they are getting. In fact, the first step in the Coaching process is to help the client understand the life they want to have. The vision of their lives must come from their heart and soul, instead of going down a road that they were told they “should” follow or buying into someone else’s paradigm of a good life.
As Life Coaches we do not automatically accept what a client says is his or her goal. Through thoughtful and powerful questioning we guide our clients to first find the real goal that they themselves want to achieve.
We continue on to help our clients with the essential tools they need to help them modify, improve upon and change (where needed) those unwanted behaviors that have turned into “bad habits.” They are given practical “homework” which consists of applying these tools; with diligence and hard work, the new tools in order to start to correct the unwanted behaviors and they start to replace the “bad habits” with new “good habits”, that will lead them to the personal and professional life which they can embrace and be truly proud of.
Life Coaching is the Key that unlocks a state of knowing oneself in an honest and healthy manner. Our clients arrive at a level of insightfulness without needing to leave behind their current lives and worldly possessions, its being free to talk about anything that is blocking their view of a happier life and discovering that becoming your most successful, happiest self can be profoundly satisfying.
UPS, Miami, Florida, Alix Apollon, Corporate Legal Director for Latin America: “For reasons stemming from my continuous travels in Latin America, my marriage came under extreme strain and was on the verge of ending. Due to my religious beliefs and my sense of commitment, this was not what I wanted. But I had no idea how to turn the situation around. The Coaching I received from Liza opened my eyes not only to the tools I needed to learn in order to rebuild my marriage but also to how I had been unwittingly violating my personal values. Thank you Liza for saving my 26 year marriage.”
Irv Flamer & Associates, Long Island, New York, has been one of the top producing agencies of New York Life Insurance for many years. Its President, Irv Flamer, holds the record for achieving Chairman’s Council more consecutive years than any other NYLIC agent: “Achieving success in business came easy to me. It took long hours visiting prospective clients practically on a 24/7 basis for many years. I cannot stress more strongly how important the Coaching work I did with Jeffrey Silber was to repairing the damage that was done to my marriage and my relationship with my children by my years of being absent. Now that my family life is on the mend and I am finding that equilibrium, I can begin to truly enjoy my financial success.”
Frequently Asked Questions
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No not at all. Life Coaching provides tools for those people who do not need profound foundational work which is what psychology accomplishes. We work with clients who have a healthy sense of who they are and want to learn tools in order to be the best person they are capable of being. Psychology deals more with your past and how it got you to this moment and Life Coaching deals with the present and how to best utilize who you are now, which in turn will help you build a better future.
A real willingness to embrace the Coaching process, which means being honest and open when it comes to doing your “homework”, which is practical and will start to make a positive difference once you apply it.
The truth is, no. If someone is suffering from psychological issues, we cannot Coach this person. Once becoming a client not doing the work required, either in the session and outside of the session i.e., doing the homework given by the Coach, more than likely, this is not a person who can be Coached.
It depends on how many sessions you take per month (the norm is 3 one hour sessions per month) and how much effort you put into the work you need to do. We usually have clients who have sessions from 6 months to a year; in rare instances we have had clients who have done amazing work and are done in 3 to 6 months; these are highly unusual results.
Absolutely not. We have a Confidentiality Agreement with each of our clients; what is said in a session stays between Coach and client. We also recommend that our clients not share their sessions with loved ones because of comments that might be made based on the relationship with the client which might influence him/her in a negative manner although the comment may be well intentioned.
There are no guarantees in life, in general. Having said that, successes will come, sometimes quickly and sometimes it will take a bit longer, and yet other times it will feel like you’re taking steps backward; that’s okay sometimes “slow and steady wins the race”. I can assure you that one fine day you will, in a session, at the office, or at home have that “aha” moment and you will know that you are making real progress.
Absolutely! As a matter of fact we do this often and it helps because we teach both how to communicate in the way the other best takes in the information that is being presented to them. We teach healthy communication skills, even when there are issues that cause couples to fight; we teach tools to help you during a verbal disagreement.
This is a difficult question because our clients are not trained Coaches, but they can teach by example, meaning if you are using good communication tools; listening and asking questions and listening (I know I repeated this, but it’s so important, it’s worth repeating), this can have an impact on a partner/spouse. And with other loved ones maybe that client might recommend Coaching or some other trained professional that would be of benefit.
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